5 Things I Learned About Marriage from My Honeymoon


February 5, 2010, I married the love of my life.  February 8, 2010, We returned home.  Sadly, for various reasons, we weren’t able to take our honeymoon right then.  We thought it wouldn’t be till October that we’d really get to take some time to get away.  However, Fast forward nearly 5 months.  June 22, Penny and I found ourselves boarding a plane for an Alaskan Cruise- finally off on our long-awaited honeymoon.  And as I reflect on the past 12 days, I’m struck with a few thoughts on marriage

1) I married up, y’all!

Here’s the thing, no matter what I do or what my education, in the end, I’m just a good ol’ boy from Kentucky.  I was raised simple.  So getting to live the high life, slipping bellmen tips, having people call me Mr. Mulberry, staying in hotels with ornate decorative moulding- I felt like I was in another world.  That was about that time that Penny whispered to me, “You married up, now act like you belong here.”  Of course it was followed by a smile and a wink.

2) Marriage is amazing, if it’s with the right person.

I’m definitely a fan of marriage.  It’s fun.  It’s good stuff.  But it’s also hard. Worth it, but hard.  I’ve got to tell you, you get married to the wrong person and its gonna be hell.  That being said, I know I got this one right.  I love the fact that there’s someone that really just knows me.  No secrets.  I don’t have to hide anything from.  I can just be me.  And then top it off with the fact that she’s my best friend.  Its good stuff.  I love that girl.

3) Try as I might, I’m not telepathic.

I’m not sure where it got engrained in me, probably some old school Disney or some country song, that my wife and I would be so in tune with each other that Penny would just be able to look at me and know what was going on with me.  That she would know me so well that she would be able to predict with 100% accuracy how I will respond to what she says.  Not only will she not know what I’m thinking all the time, there’s no way I can know what she is thinking or how she will respond.  The key to this one :: The C word.  Communication.

4) We really are for each other.

Its so easy to get to a spot where you feel like the other person is secretly plotting against you.  Like they are holding meetings with people to plot your downfall- hiring secret agents and private eyes.  Here’s what I learned, my wife is really on my side.  She really wants to see me succeed.  She is really by my side.  She really is proud of me.  More than that, we are a team.  And we are a great team.  That’s a great feeling.

5) It’s not about us.

Yeah, so its our honeymoon.  This a time where we get to be together and be a newly married couple.  That’s what the honeymoon is about, right? And I was keenly aware of something the entire time we were gone- where we got go was a gift from Jesus.  Alaska is beautiful.  To get to be on a cruise ship the whole time and be pampered was amazing.  Getting to go on tours and see glaciers and the wildlife.  Those were gifts.  But the people that we encountered, the people who we ate dinner with, our waiter and room attendant, the guy who came up to us to use our computer, the guy I was playing black jack with, or tour guides- those were entrustments.  Those were people that we got to love.  People we got to accept and not judge.  People we got to do vacation with.  It wasn’t about us.  It was about them.  And here’s the thing- that translates back home too- our marriage, our lives here, is not about us.  It’s not about getting to be together and enjoy one another’s company for the rest of our lives.  We are a team.  And we are about others.

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    • Bonnie
    • July 17th, 2010

    And the thing is….you just never know God’s total picture either so some of those “entrustments” you come in touch with, you just might be “their entrustments” and your paths crossing at that point in life was not by coincidence what so ever but because God may well have them plant a seed in you that you just never know when he will come along later in lfie and send the sunshine, the water, the fertilizer and make that seed grow in some ministry, some mission, some passionate serve place He has in our futures. Just being able to go back to the father with it all is just amazing because we get to rest in knowing that it’s ALL in His hands and knowing how much He loves us, our hearts get to just be totally free in Him.

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